[align=center]五一假期前[/align][align=center]不少中小学都进行了期中考试[/align][align=center]现在，假期过完了[/align][align=center]考试卷子也发下来了[/align][align=center]到家长在盆友圈里晒孩子成绩单的时间了[/align][align=center]可一圈刷下来发现：[/align][align=center]这哪里是晒成绩单啊[/align][align=center]这简直是大型段子手现场[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/a3cc83128a3949a98ac44df6c98fffd0.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“妈妈喜欢吃”[/align][align=center]所以说各位妈妈[/align][align=center]以后别再嚷嚷为啥瘦不下来了[/align][align=center]答案都写在你闺女的考卷里了[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/37db4424506c4865a04ff972ff40adaf.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“我的女朋友呢？”[/align][align=center]小小年纪就学会秀恩爱[/align][align=center]还给不给我们这些单身狗留点活路了[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/4dc7e330a8e643a7a44732834403bc22.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]孩子别怕，大胆说出你的故事[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/b4bdf10c74e748f29f82b29bb053caee.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/e81f21579eca402a850a2da2cee04242.jpeg[/img][/align][align=center]“大河向东流，天上的星星他妹抖”[/align][align=center]孩子，你的发音莫不是爷爷奶奶教的？[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/0d5893d4fdab40c7997c5b4f21fbace9.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]把菜刀理解成兵器也就算了[/align][align=center]可“还可以照光”是什么鬼？？？[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/18c7466293f24e8dbb44262960e974cf.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“妈妈虽然是女的，但很凶”[/align][align=center]妈妈：你晚上回家[/align][align=center]我让你见识一下什么叫真正的凶[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/1bdc0703d6e041d8a58ec816e3daaf5c.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]行了，憋写了[/align][align=center]全世界都知道你家有钱了[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/deac0aa66644460a84764b1019ca6fee.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“妈妈是一个臭美的女人”[/align][align=center]孩子，你真的知道的太多了[/align][align=center]emmmmmmm[/align][align=center]▼[/align][align=center][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/5361d8c832074af9a414b8d8e8355746.jpeg[/img][/align][align=center]刘翔哭晕在厕所里[/align][align=center]▼[/align][align=center][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/94bc415bc38b43e68ab944dbf210fea4.jpeg[/img][/align][align=center]你家拉大便是腾空的？[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/fd9cd7b77f3d49e1a063e70991d57588.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]这张卷子千万不要让你亲妈看到[/align][align=center]只能帮你到这里了[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/e25953a630bf41558b12b26bbf6339fa.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“子孙—孙子—子孙—孙子”[/align][align=center]你以为老师xia吗[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/43ed7cc3ea5b448f940206c344995209.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“到了清明节，祝老师节日快乐”[/align][align=center]恕我直言，和这位同学相比[/align][align=center]在座的各位都是辣鸡[/align][align=center]▼[/align][align=center][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/2b6adf38dd974bba8299cd9e8c3ad0ed.jpeg[/img][/align][align=center]小小年纪[/align][align=center]就有了如此远大的志向[/align][align=center]是个可塑之才了[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/32f1c92595594afdb6b5c61e5711a4e7.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“呵呵”一时爽[/align][align=center]可你想过后果吗[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/9616c54cf797402ab1a817f699cdda19.png[/img][/color]
[color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/a197c693949b4f7a851ebdb743aa2464.png[/img][/color]
[color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/c6230a1e3b0248999a58a576e34172b7.png[/img][/color]
[align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/57504f8337e44c7fa46da4ff5c58f444.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“要是买了宝马，全世界的美女都跟着你走”[/align][align=center]小小年纪就把这个世界看得如此透彻[/align][align=center]长大了不dei了啊[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/8fea3cbf37694a9a9984074054b560ef.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“西游记的作者是周星驰”[/align][align=center]哈哈哈哈哈这孩子是看[/align][align=center]《大话西游》长大的吧[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/532f1f08761148e2a6e4a3d8143c4efc.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]恕我直言，“大大”可不是这么用的[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/1d699e65414a49dd97e42e7bed169840.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“小姑娘的心像棉花一样纯洁”[/align][align=center]现在的小学生都这么会撩了吗？？？[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/3d2aaef4b8e041e9ba2bb67395608850.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]嗯，心画的不错[/align][align=center]下次造词可以人性化一点[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/19576701bad8489b930981c6870f3e77.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“为什么能成为宋代著名的书画家？”[/align][align=center]“因为她是宋代人”[/align][align=center]哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈[/align][align=center]耿直boy，说吧，想让我怎么夸你[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/4c73b962ddd54671b74b81a253e7720a.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“五八四十”[/align][align=center]我差一点就信了[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/b00bd1ce57624d2fb105472b705ffedb.png[/img][/color]
[color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/4c9541b57d984126b0e3cbf65ca0bf3d.png[/img][/color]
[color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/ee18f04fe0034c8788a6a4c8cf30f43a.png[/img][/color]
[align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/f593ad3ba51549348cc6a0f3037c7aaf.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]你妈是不会做菜[/align][align=center]但你妈会揍你[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/9447524f1daa433daab489b71b5fa29a.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]“顶牛谈琴，一箭扎两”[/align][align=center]“树叶盖脸，大桶扣蛙”[/align][align=center]孩子看图说话的能力真是一级棒！[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/499ee249b329426ab6761edb6384aba5.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]讲真，看了三秒[/align][align=center]我愣是没发现辣里不对[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/595a5e62bf83435c834a3df09ca9db1b.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]祖蓝，祖蓝的，你是跑男看多了吧[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/ac7f904a78354dd7bf68f3dd2f50c1a1.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]我也想问，你是咋拼出来的？[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/a792ae28a0fe4065b711bb53af59953a.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]但如果你以为孩子们的脑洞就止步于此[/align][align=center]就大错特错了！[/align][align=center]不是我吹[/align][align=center]只要给他们一张纸一支笔[/align][align=center]全世界都是他们的舞台[/align][align=center]最近一位老师发现有同学不遵守课堂纪律[/align][align=center]竟然在胳膊上画小猪佩奇！[/align][align=center]于是老师想了一招“惩罚”他[/align][align=center]“不是喜欢画吗，那下课再给我画上50个！”[/align][align=center]孩子：画就画，我们社会人就没带怕的！[/align][align=center]50多个，不带重样的！[/align][align=center]还贴心的给你编上号！[/align][align=center]就问你谁能做到😂😂😂[/align][align=center]▼[/align][align=center][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/378faeaf6df14aaa973c527b3274a4d7.jpeg[/img][/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/5780e012f7a346889c7da8e85ff8ead2.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]当然最骚气的操作还是这个赠品[/align][align=center]脑补了一下孩子的内心os[/align][align=center]“小爷我今儿开心，再给你画一个！”[/align][align=center]▼[/align][color=#191919][img]http://5b0988e595225.cdn.sohucs.com/images/20180504/5214bfdb5ca447638799bd5cf6760d0d.jpeg[/img][/color]
[align=center]（图片来源：可乐大叔）[/align][align=center]不dei不说[/align][align=center]真的被这些孩子[/align][align=center]惊天地泣鬼神的脑洞给深深折服了[/align][align=center]你们，都是人才啊！！！[/align]
